~ Click Here ~

Thursday, June 5, 2014


   There is more to the meaning of life than working, paying bills and waiting until we die.  Certainly, family, friends and love are a fundamental aspects of a fulfilled life but I am confident there is more than meets the eye, to the reality around us, and thus I’m passionate about understanding reality and truth in a deeper way. Throughout my life I’ve read countless books, had thousands of hours of inspiring conversations, attended hundreds of seminars presented by brilliant and enlightening people but nothing has compared to the transformative effects of writing a public, spiritually related, blog and could be for you too. 

     While a spiritual paradigm is unique to each person, family and culture, the deeper questions such as “What is the meaning of life?”, “Where did we come from?”, “Where are we going?” and others have been debated and pondered since the dawn of mankind and will likely continue as long as there is someone to ask the simple question of why.  These fundamental questions have inspired thousands of religions, philosophies and spiritual traditions that only highlights the psychological impact these questions have on us if they are left unanswered. 

     With so many different answers to the same questions, it is challenging to sort out what has foundations of truth and what is snake oil.  Over the years, it has become apparent that the only way to learn what I sought, and still seek, to understand is to do so directly.  Perhaps it is arrogant to presume it is possible but just as a mountain climber might say the reason he climbs a mountain is because it is there, and he/she can, I in turn feel the same way about exploring these questions.  I do so because they are there, and one of the best parts of being human is that we have a unique ability to ask why.

     For as long as I can recall I’ve been passionate about asking questions and would rather have a thousand unanswered questions than one wrong answer.  While I never impose my views on anyone, this aspect of my personality does not always make people comfortable.  Nevertheless, this is acceptable to me since only when we are uncomfortable do we begin to lift the veil of our delusions.  All too often along my path I’ve discovered that everyone wants to give me their answers, and while often well meaning, is simply not what I am seeking. 

     With all of the books I’ve read, people I’ve talked to, shows I’ve watched, seminars I’ve attended and more it was clear that I learned to articulate esoteric concepts fluidly, and efficiently, but in reality these had been little more than philosophical platitudes.  Surprisingly, with all of the ways I’ve explored these questions it was not until I started a public blog did I get some answers.

      It was not any special realization that inspired me to write a blog, but I thought it couldn’t hurt to try and see what happened.  Over time, I was able to move past the platitudes that previously limited my perspective and at this point it started to transform and deepen many of my thoughts and questions.  It became apparent to me that all this time I was seeking answers when what I needed to find was better questions or in other words only asking questions that supported what I wanted to believe.  It took time and persistence, but things began to evolve even more and deeper questions started to form that manifested insights that had been beyond my grasp beforehand and all of this due to a simple blog.

     Welcome insights from various readers enriched the nature and tone of my thoughts and questions to the point that it started to change my personal paradigm in a permanent way.  One transformative key was to read previously written entries and all too often I cringed at what I had thought had been an enormous insight the day or two before. 

     Writing has not simply been a means to express my thoughts, but most importantly a tool that has helped me to unlock my mind and free my thoughts.  While I still have much further to go it has, without question, been nothing less than a catalyst for a huge paradigm shift and thus I have learned to love and appreciate it more every day.  Blogging differed from other forms of writing since I felt accountable to my audience to share what could be complex ideas in a digestible way, and in-turn understood them better myself.  Unexpectedly, it also turned into a way to connect with like-minded people that I would not have been able to do in any other way and certainly not in such a meaningful way.  Blogging changed my life and depending upon the questions you seek it may have a positive impact upon you as well. 

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Time Will Tell Many Tales

As time flows by in my life I've found the focus upon my spiritual journey appears to naturally wax and wane. Over the last few years life has offered some intense personal challenges and thus has dominated my focus and will likely continue to do so for some time going forward.  I'm remarried, professionally working towards the best job opportunity I've had, going back to finish my degree (online) and soon enough will have a home again and children that I've not before had.  By most measure this would be everything that anyone would want and while I'm not complaining I feel that I need to properly integrate into my world my spiritual focus. 

Sounds easy right...? However, for some reason it has been a bigger challenge than I've anticipated.  Years ago I was passionate and little more was important to me but time keeps ticking by and I my deepest dreams and desires feel like they are slipping away.  Upon reflection though I feel the reason is a bit complex but also very simple and I'm hoping writing them here will help me sort out my thoughts and hopefully aid in integrating this critical aspect of myself into what I consider my new life.

I've explored many religions, philosophies and more in some depth and while there is always further to go on any subject I've come to a realization that pretty much everything we've ever been taught and told is basically bullshit.   While this may seem self-defeating I don't really feel that way.  The realization is the stripping of delusion that we know anything at all.  No matter if we are talking about Christianity, Buddhism, Islam, New Age, Wicca, Atheism, politics in general, the news, media and pretty much everything I do except now as being all illusions and delusions.  I've explored these things so deeply and feel like I'm done with all of it.  In a sense I'm burnt out and almost disgusted by all the BS and seek something pure and real.  

In many posts on this blog I've articulated in some depth about how and why I've made it to this point but all of this is still only a shadow of the full scope of what I've explored and pondered.  I'm over all of it.  So now what... I've actually been pondering a lot recently if I am an Atheist and in the end I may be an Atheist but I'm not sure this is a proper fit either. While many of the points of Atheism I completely agree with there is also a lot missing since there is no appearance of the wonder of life.  No matter how much BS exists in the world I cannot dismiss the universe exists and that through the lens of life itself we offer the universe the opportunity to experience itself.  Atheism focuses so much time and energy on religion (which someone needs to do) but there is so much more to what reality is composed of.

Science has been a huge spiritual path to awakening and I'm always amazed when people will disbelieve science and/or doubt it but have no trouble believing what, by any measure, are crazy beliefs because they 'feel' right.  What is missing in science is the same thing that is missing in Atheism and that is the sense of wonder.  No doubt some would disagree with me on this premise but without going into all the details I do feel this is the case.

Buddhism is still the most close path that I harmonize with and if pressed would say I am a Buddhist but have also seen that it is filled with a sea of religious baggage that has to have a diluting factor.  Meditation is great and I've previously been obsessed with enlightenment, which I still do believe is real and achievable, but most of Buddhism has become a way to sell books, waste people's time with things like compassion.  Yes! this is very important and well worth a focus but this is not the path to truth.

If anyone does read this and if anyone who reads it are familiar with half of what I've written would no doubt have excellent points to discuss, attack and/or offer insight but this is not meant to be an exhaustive overview of everything I feel to be true or BS.  That would need many books and only feed the pointlessness I'm trying to avoid.

While writing all of this I have pondered that in reality I've still been on my path all of this time.  I'm over all of it and have broken, shattered and/or cracked all of my beliefs and/or delusions (or so I believe) and I'm not sure what to do.  Everything I read all sounds the same and appears to really just be little more than platitudes I loath and every teacher, I care to know, all teach the same things.  Science has opened up some amazing perceptions but there is nothing new. Yes, as time goes on I learn more details and get more insights but it is all the same... I'm bored.

I need to ponder all of this some more and no doubt time will indeed tell many tales.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Limitations of Thoughts and Language on the Spiritual Path

Our thoughts and the language we use to articulate them have distinct limits. If I was going to explain the experience of what salt tastes like to someone I would not be able to share it through words. No matter how many things I could say none of them would replace just a moment of experience by that person tasting the salt for themselves. 

Building off of this for many years poetry frustrated me since I favor things that are black and white and poetry is anything but that. What I now see is that poetry is as close we can come to explain something as esoteric as an experience through the limitations of words. With all of that since everything we speak is a metaphor it will only create delusions and shadows of the truth. Whatever the truth may be it most certainly transcends our thoughts, sense of self and mind but yet all of those things are tools to achieve that understanding. 


Science and Spirituality: Conflict or Allies in the Search for Truth?

To me science without spirituality is hollow and spirituality without science is naive. Both are seeking to find the truth and have a great deal to teach each other but they will always be in conflict until all is known and there is no more mystery. 

Science has discovered some amazing things that have powerful spiritual implications but their dogma will never allow them to step beyond the information and journey into the mystery in the same way a spiritual person would do. 

In contrast a spiritual person who does not ground themselves into some scientific knowledge will spend their life chasing lightening bolts in the belief they are messages from god. 

Both have their limitations but together their understanding does bring us closer to truth.

Does understanding how a rose is built from the atoms, chemicals, genes and more take away its beauty or enhance it? As with all things that are related to beauty that is up to you to define but I for one believe the more I know the more I stand in awe of the magick of life and reality.

Sunday, October 28, 2012


There is truth in the saying that we are not humans having a spiritual experience but rather spiritual beings who are having a human experience.  With this in mind it is safe to say the last few years have offered me a huge sea of human challenges that have greatly distracted me from my spiritual writing and study.  While the flame has at times been smothered to an ember I've refused to let it die and believe now I can finally start to fan the flame and believe it will, once more, soon be a roaring flame.

One of the greatest and most important tasks that I have on my list of things to do is write a book, or series of books, and believe the time may well be now to manifest this without anymore excuses.  While I know what I want to share will fall upon mostly deaf ears I do feel that what I want to share has value.  In many ways my challenge has been that I want to put too much into one book and perhaps it would be more wise to spread things out so it will be more digestible.

Though life has offered its distractions at least I now have clarity on 'what' I want to write about and believe I also know what the title should be. "Breaking Free - Of the Myths that Bind Us"

So... now it is time to check this dream off of my bucket list and get to work!

Tuesday, March 13, 2012


It is said that there are few things bigger than the universe save for the human ego.  While we've learned that the universe really does not circle the earth a long time ago with our collective belief of self-importance suggests that it might as well be.  We have been, by far, the most successful known creature on earth that has ever lived by our collective efforts over time.  However, there are limitations that we have as humans and understanding that we do is not accepting that we are 'less' in any way but rather gives us the ability to find ways to mitigate those limitations and truly maximize our true potential.

Certainly, a dog, cat, tree, etc all have limitations that we can plainly see but they may feel the same way about us.  As an example a dogs sense of smell is vastly beyond our abilities and any cat I've ever met certainly seems to feel we have anything over them.  They are perfectly adapted to their environments and so are we but if we have any one thing that gives us our true potential I would suggest it our ability for language that helps us articulate our thoughts and dreams.  We've developed over our evolutionary history a very fine tuned ability to share concepts with each other and together be far more than what we could ever be alone.  Our ability to ask questions seems to be the main source of our ability to expand our consciousness. However, language does have its limitations as proven by the fact that there are no amount of words that can really ever articulate an experience. 

A metaphor that I like to use is that of trying to explain the taste of salt to someone who has never tasted it before.  While we can come fairly close by using comparisons, examples and other like tools to help express this idea, even to the point that the person who has never tried it could then pass this information along as though they have experienced it, there really is not enough words you can use that would effectively replace just a simple moment of direct experience.  Experience is an internal and intimate event that language most certainly has a way of helping us digest the experience but this tends to greatly filter the experience into what we expect it to be via our ego, presumptions, assumptions, biases, culture, spiritual views and all of the other filters.  

Additionally, we can only experience reality through a narrow slit of perception. As we can only see a narrow band of light waves, sound waves and so on but with this narrow view we shape our world view.  One can only wonder how that world view would alter if we have a different range of perception such as the ability to smell like our old friend the dog or see like an eagle.  Certainly, there are things about reality and ourselves we could learn if were able to reach beyond the limitations of our senses.

These limitations are not much of a concern for most us no more than it is a concern for a dog or a cat with regards to their limitations. In many ways it is hard to know what you don't know unless you try to find a way to reach beyond and what differs us from the rest of the animal kingdom is our ability to wonder, to dream, to imagine things that are yet unborn.  It is our window into what can be instead of what simply is.  

Our paradigm of thought that we live in conditions us to accept reality as it is and many cultures even to suppress the pursuit of questions unless they exist within a well defined boundary.  This has served us well depending upon the questions are you comfortable asking. However, if you seek to transcend our limitations we may very well need to find ways to reach well beyond the fold. I'm not so sure that we can do that with the knowledge that we gain from traditional sources alone nor with the senses that have empowered us, yet restrains us from growing beyond. 

It may seem counter-intuitive but the ancient and perhaps profound saying of 'know thyself' may truly be the key.  A key that requires us to look within where there are no boundaries, no physical limitations and only the potentially boundless realm of our inner mind and imagination.  If only we can find ways to unlearn what we believe we know and shed our ego, expectations, assumptions, presumptions and what we expect to happen. What we discover could be far more amazing, bizarre and filled with wonder than what currently meets the eye.    

The danger, and risk, of this type of journey is that the ego knows us rather well.  To free our mind it would seem that we need to free ourselves from this and unlearn the conditioning that we have had since birth that can easily alter and distort our experience, realizations and it is wise to walk carefully.  Ever more wise to find some sort of a guide, a spiritual Sherpa if you will, that can help you navigate the pitfalls, traps, dead ends and egoic fantasies of self-indulgence that would certainly be abundant upon such a journey. There are plenty of souls that would be more than willing to assist you in any such journey but keep in mind that the person with all the answers may be the person with the greatest delusion.  No matter what path you take it is your journey and just like no one can be born for you, or die for you no one can walk this journey for you either.  

To highlight, I'm not suggesting that this is the answer nor that I would be such a guide but perhaps this may something to ponder.


Wednesday, October 26, 2011


Lucid dreaming: Is becoming consciously 'aware' that you are dreaming while you are dreaming and a rather interesting and honestly cool experience.  Apparently, not everyone has had this type of experience with some people firmly believing it is not even possible or true.

When this realization comes over you a sense of unlimited power and being overwhelms you. This is a skill that can be learned and expanded much like a artist going to a school to become a better artist. However, in the end I wonder if it might also be that some people are born with more skills then others. I could spend my entire life learning to paint but never hold a candle to so many others who have a natural inclination to genius.

I have a theory that I intend on exploring in far more detail and would love to hear some other thoughts concerning it. Basically, to learn to wake up in lucid dreaming you must focus on, beforehand, on some object or key in the dream that your conscious mind can grab on to and be reminded to 'wake up'. Once you see that object it wakes you up within the dream but it takes a considerable amount of time and patience to make this work.

Based upon that concept I am really wondering about the same thing with our daily waking lives. If it is true that we are really asleep and awakening to the real nature of reality is the key then perhaps this might explain the stories of Zen monks hitting the students in some physical way to push them into enlightenment.

Ofcourse at the right time is key to this working but the same could be said during lucid dreaming. Might it be possible that the dream world may be a more direct path into the deeper sense of reality? Even more might it be possible to meditate upon a key that might 'wake you up' in this reality when discovered?

I need to learn a great deal more about this but I think the potential of this might be something profound.

Your thoughts are welcome